Musings along my path out of depression and into twin mommyhood
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
I reclaimed my childhood enthusiasm when I had children.
As the years roll by, seriousness seeps into our souls and sillyness slips away.
You can't help but feel the childlike wonder when their eager minds discover things adults take for granted: airplanes, ocean waves, carousels...everything is new and curious.
We took the girls to the Santa Cruz beach boardwalk and what a feast for their senses! My mom couldn't get over the look in Tristyn's eyes when we stood facing the grand wooden Looff Carousel, music blaring from the pipe organ, the brightly colored, meticulously carved horses making me dizzy.
What was superficial and boring to me as a teenager now felt filled with possibility. Each sight was an opportunity to share with them.
It's as if my eyes have readjusted to the wonderland of children.
While driving up the California coast over the weekend, we spied pumpkin patches galore, with the pumpkins displayed in all sorts of creative ways, and each farm elicited a fresh exclamation of joy.
I remember an email I wrote to a friend while pregnant, in an attempt to dissuade my fears and convince myself that my life needed children, telling her I had had an epiphany - what I needed was Disney princesses, Winnie the Pooh, baby dolls and brightly colored tutus.